Day 171: Aging (not so) gracefully

Ah, Maddie is in her crib, down for the count. Yes, we have been blessed with a good sleeper. I feel guilty telling other moms this, those moms stuck working the 3am shift with a crying baby every night. Normally this would be the time I would sit down with a nice cup of tea and a good book... oh, who am I kidding? In fact I pour myself a generous glass of wine and watch an hour or two of reality tv. As I type this I am awaiting the start of the Laguna Beach premier. God, how old am I? It's one thing watching the kids of Beverly Hills 90210 struggle through heartache and math tests when you're 17, but somehow it's just a tad more pathetic when you're 30, no? But I love it. I admit it.

And while we're on the topic, let me tell you a little something about being 30: it sucks. I have been 30 all of 2 1/2 weeks and already I have managed to throw my back out. Now I wish I could say this happened while training for a triathlon or scrambling up a rockface or something, but no, the extreme activity that led to this injury was... brushing my hair. I got out of the shower, picked up my brush, ran it through my hair, and the next thing I knew I was splayed awkwardly on the bathroom floor, suddenly afflicted with debilitating back pain that required my mom to half-carry me back to bed.

Now that I think about it, this is a good metaphor to describe the point I am at in life right now: somewhere between Laguna Beach and an assisted living facility. The back problem landed me in my doctor's office today. He is a family friend, I've gone to him since I was a baby, and he delivered Maddie too, which is kind of cool. Anyways, when he saw me sitting in the office today he asked, all smiles, if I was pregnant again. Were it not for the fact that I can barely walk I would have run screaming from the room. Those first few months with Maddie were so traumatic that at this point I am pretty sure she will be an only child. It started with breastfeeding which, surprise!, turns out not to be such a natural and lovely process after all, and ended with a frightening trip through the fog of postpartum depression from which I am only just now emerging. I have reached the point now where I can look at her and definitely know that the whole thing was worth it, but am far from thinking that I'd ever like to go for round two. I guess you never know for sure what's going to happen, but for now I think we will be thankful for the beautiful girl we've got and try to battle any future reproductive urges with another puppy or two!