Day174: Milestone mania

I read in a home decor magazine recently that you shouldn't begin a home renovation project if you have kids under the age of 18 months. Having not entirely taken that wisdom to heart, we started work on the house this weekend. My husband Fernando is right now in the kitchen wearing a large and scary face mask that is supposed to prevent him from breathing in the horrifying amounts of dust and mildew he is uncovering. It also makes him sound like Darth Vader when he talks, so he can't seem to resist saying ominously, "Madeline, I am your father..." every time he passes by her, to which she responds with her standard expression of startled confusion and mild concern.

With Fernando hard at work, I focussed my attention today on Maddie's milestones. Milestones are a big thing in the baby world. Most every baby book includes milestones sections telling you what your baby should be doing every week. After reading this you inevitably feel that your baby is far superior to others her age ("Maddie's been rolling over for weeks. She's obviously a genius.") or falling dangerously behind ("Sitting up? She can't sit up! Why can't she sit up??"). If you then want to move to an even higher realm of anxiety, a good way to do it is by visiting mommy message boards online. Here you will read other moms boast about their babies who are not only rolling over and sitting up, but also crawling, talking and cooking breakfast on weekends. And so, even though I know that these milestones are ridiculous and should be ignored entirely, I still catch myself trying to ensure that Maddie is "keeping up." So today we worked on crawling. Or, I guess it would be more accurate to say that I worked on crawling while she lay on her stomach and cried. She then flipped herself over onto her back (showing advanced dexterity and determination!) and looked at me as if to say, "What the hell is wrong with you?" She likes that look a lot. Anyways, I think we made some pretty substantial progress.