My Britney

So last night I took a break from spit-polishing the floors, knitting Maddie’s fall wardrobe and baking for the homeless to curl up on the couch and catch a bit of the MTV Video Awards.

Those who know me possibly know where this is going. But if you don’t, I should probably first make a confession: I love The Brit. Otherwise known as Britney Spears. Through the innocent schoolgirl period, the years with Justin Timberlake (still really hoping for a reunion there), the predictable red-string Kaballah phase and subsequent Madonna make-out session, the Vegas wedding, the real wedding, the Cheetos and the children, and of course the sad and appalling public spiral. I’ve sometimes been embarrassed to admit it, but I’ve always loved her.

But this past week it seemed like the hope might not have been misplaced after all. We saw some happy family photos. There was a new song that was (gasp!) actually not an assault on the senses. I’m telling you, Maddie loves it. And that girl’s got taste. And there was the VMA opening gig, apparently endless rehearsals in the works. She was hanging with P. Diddy (is he still using the P.?), things were turning around. Until last night.

My lord, what happened last night? The wig was atrocious. The bedazzled bra and panties were a very questionable choice. The lip synching was a disaster. The dancing, if you could call it that, was laughable. I swear she busted out a shoulder shimmy that I did in a grade 5 dance recital – only I am pretty sure I did it with considerably more flair. She looked like she’d shown up expecting to crash on the couch and watch movies but instead was squeezed into some cheap sequined lingerie and thrown on stage for amateur hour. In front of millions of people.

So what is it? Madness? Addiction? Depression? Plain old fatigue? All of the above? Let’s set aside the fact that she has children depending on her for a minute. Whatever she has been doing, or whatever has been done to her, the results are not pretty. I love her still, but the girl needs serious help.